Thursday, April 23, 2009

SHHHHHHH! Please don't tell on me

I am an audiobook fan. I get to listen to TONS of books while at work and I am an avid reader/listener. There are so many good books out there! (Hey Heidi, when is Miss Delacourt going to come out on audio???) While I was listening to a book earlier this week one of the characters was talking about a tattoo that he had.

So, here is where we get into my little secret. I have tried so hard not to like tattoos. For the most part I think they are really trashy and gross. BUT- I dated this guy when I was in college. He had the sexiest dragon crawling out of his skin on his shoulder. He designed it himself. I love a good bad-boy!

Don't get me wrong. I love that Hubby is sweet and a wonderful dad and he loves me. I know that. I just was pondering on the fact that if I could do a little maintenance on him one of the things I would do is get him a sexy leather jacket, a tasteful sexy tattoo... and here is the biggest secret of all- I'd get him a monster motorcycle. Shhhh! Don't say that so loud. Someone might hear you/me.

Being a mom, I would NEVER want my kids to actually see the tattoo- that would just be for me. I worry about him riding the motorcycle, something might happen to him. But, this is a dream that I live vicariously through the MANY books that I read.

I know my bishop reads my blog, so I might be having a meeting with him on Sunday about the inappropriate content and my secret wants/desires, but I have to be honest, it is worth it to just get this out there.

There are some limitations and requirements for me to actually like a tattoo. I hate colored tattoos! H.A.T.E. them! Just plain black ink will do, thank you very much. I don't like them on the ankle, calf, neck, head, hands, feet, etc. ONLY on the shoulder, shoulderblade or upper back. Even lower back is not quite as cool. I also don't like ones that cover the whole back. YUCK. Make it simple, clean lines and such.

TOO MUCH! and there is color...

TOO BIG, and there is color, yuck!

Not bad. Simple... and on a muscular arm, YUMMY!

I also like Celtic symbols or something with awsome meaning. But, NOT BIG and colorful. And, remember the placement of the tattoo! If you are young and a female, getting one on your belly or side isn't the wisest of ideas. If you are planning on getting pregnant you could end up with a dragon with stretchmarks. (Excuse me- I think I threw up a little in my mouth) Or your cute little heart will be broken or looking quite awkward once your skin goes back.

I actually asked Hubby if he would get a tattoo if I asked him to. He said N.O. Where is the love??? I'm gonna get back to my reading now.

Theme song- Tattoo by Jordin Sparks